Saturday, October 22, 2005

well here i am again

i think it's finally time to admit me to a pysch ward....i mean how the hell can i be infatuated with a DEAD man?????? yep, i'm one sick cookie alright. eternally wild with power...mystifies me...but what the least it can't be considered cheating right? i mean after all....he's DEAD. but GODDDDDD i would have loved a go with him at least once, maybe twice or thrice....perhaps a weekend? there's something about him that makes me sweat...i'm obsessed....michael you are haunting me and no doubt laughing. i need you tonight because i'm not sleeping....i'm lonely i've got to let you know...

Friday, October 21, 2005


Ok I'm like pissed today. Last night or rather early this morning around 2:00 am AOL would not let me sign on...keep getting something about the network not responding. This lasted until sometime later this morning, like 12 pm. Dammit I was ready to BLOG last night but thanks to good old AOL, those bastards. I'm having a dilemma, I'm obessing about a dead rock star. Never even heard of the group until I saw them on TV and then did some history checking via the good old internet. Now this dead singer won't get out of my head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He certainly mystifies me. I think he's goodlooking but dammit there are no good close up pictures of him. His voice is divine and I want him.....hell I have him....I'm haunted by his voice, his life and the tragic ending of his life. And I wonder, what in the hell could have been so wrong with his life that he would chose to end it and NO I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT KURT COBAIN or whatever the hell his name was. And so now it's friday and I'm ready to go home and I keep thinking about Tigger and how I murdered him. I know I did what was best for ME but was it the best for him????? It's irrelevant now since he's dead and buried. I will live with guilt over this for a long time. And Brin, what you sent was beautiful but right now I just can't get past the hurt and the pain. Ok so that's it in a handbag. Too much shit for a nutshell.

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

it was a dark and stormy night

well ok so it isn't stormy and the full moon is beautiful. it's nice and crisp outside...lower 60's...a great night to be at the state fair which is about 1 1/2 hrs away. i think johnny should take off from work and take me to the fair dammit. we could go tomorrow afternoon. i could have cotton candy, get salted roasted peanuts, corn on the cob, french fries, and REAL COKE (the cola type). i figure since i don't see the dietician until next week it gives me this week to pig out. then when i lose allllllllll that weight and look like one of the olsen twins and dye my hair red, have a facelift, eye lift and boob lift and ass lift, well maybe i'll look like a teenager again it was just my imagination running awayyyyyy with me it was just my imagination running awayyyyyyyyy with me. Dream on.

Tuesdays SUCK

We put Tigger down today. I've cried, Johnny has cried and Matt has cried. We had Tig for 13 1/2 yrs but he developed diabetes and then went into kidney failure. The vet said he was a very very sick cat. It was my decision. I felt like it would be cruel to try to keep him alive when he is so sick but I still feel like I had him murdered. Then, if that wasn't bad enough, my sugar level is high and I have to change my eating habits, lose weight and exercise. Hell, I told my dr to just go ahead and put me down. Hit 50 and the shit hits the fan blowing here where but the right place. If I could reach through this *ucking screen, I might really hurt someone so I suppose it's a good thing. We can safely say I'm in a bitchy mood and a cig would be nice, as would a coke..but HELL NO I CAN'T HAVE MY GDMF COKES ANYMORE! Just shoot me. And if by some chance some spammer reads this and wants to post their cute little comments....GO TO HELL YOU BASTARDS or come find me and I'll send your sorry ass to hell for you and I won't charge you a damn dime.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Hello's been a long time

Well, here I am. Typing typing typing. You haven't typed anything in a long time. What's up? What's up? Nuttin from where I'm sittin. Hmmmm I thinkin of what to type.....think think think. Oh! It won't be much longer and there'll be a new food lion less than 2 miles from me ANDDDDDDDDDDDDD a McDonalds. They have the best fries. And those fries look so damn good on me too. Ok so what. Gee, I'm having trouble me out. Damn...I think I'm brain dead. Carole HELP ME HERE DAMMIT. Maybe I need a nap. A nap would be nice. I fell asleep in the recliner this afternoon with my 2 sweet lil grandpuppies. I wish I could sleep as much as they do. We snoozed for maybe an hour or so. That's really interesting isnt it? HA I'll be back later with more goodies.